Thrift Stores

May I just say that I love Thrift Stores. Goodwill is not my first choice, but it is definitely all over the place and has quality stuff. They just charge more for their clothes now than they ever did. I suppose that’s true of everything, however. I needed some jeans… and I could have bought one, maybe two pair for the price I paid for the following…

I paid $65 for…. 3 pairs of jeans (one was brand new), 3 pairs of shorts (one was brand new), one skirt, one shirt, 5 belts, and one pair of shoes (all leather), and a bag of gummy bears to boot!

You can’t beat that! Just goes to show you that you can find great stuff for cheap if you are willing to look through all the not so great stuff!!

Tenebrae

 Good Friday. Darkness. Shadows. Enter into His death, so that we may fully experience Life. It’s Friday, but Sunday’s comin’.

I went to a Tenebrae service tonight. I grew up going to this service on Good Friday and it has always been one of my favorite services. It is an evening service usually with readings of the passion of Christ and candles for each reading. The traditional service I would always go to growing up, had the altar cleared of any excess, and the cross shrouded in black. Also, at the end of the service, they always slammed the Bible shut when they read Jesus’ words, “It is Finished”. The service ended in silence and darkness, and everyone would leave in silence and reflection.

It’s so easy for our culture to focus on the Easter Bunny… and the pretty new clothes everyone dons for Easter morning. But entering into the death and passion of Christ makes all the light and new life have meaning, really. I remember the stark visual difference between the bare altar shrouded in black on Good Friday, and the brilliant light on Easter morning, with the altar filled with white, somehow cleansed of the darkness. I am a visual, experiencial learner and this still impacts me. 

His sacrifice, His gift of love, His gift of grace, mercy and wholeness: all these are a part of Easter. Without these, there would be no Easter. Because of these, we can say, “Happy Easter”.

To Be Told

I’ve been reading this book and it has come at just the right time. Does this happen to you? I can pick up a book countless times, but only am I able to read it when it’s just the right time. Perfect timing on this one!  Here are some quotes from the book that resonate with me at the moment:

“Often when our world rips apart, we are able to see more easily what our story is and to hear more clearly what our name is.” p.31

“What will win — the abundant indications of randomness or our desire for more than we can see?” p. 45

“Our story will gain momentum and depth only to the degree that we honestly embrace both loss and fear.” p.46

“Real isn’t how you are made,” said the Skin Horse, “It’s a thing that happens to you. When a child loves you for a long, long time, not just to play with, but REALLY loves you, then you become Real.”  p. 67 from The Velveteen Rabbit

“The word passion comes from a Latin root that means “suffering.” It implies intense emotion that energizes a person to move. We are moved to act when we are in pain.” p.74

“As we are unnamed by the absence of our father, we find faith demanding us to begin our journey to touch the face of God. And it is on that journey that we begin to see that we have turned to others for self-definition, safety, and companionship in order to banish the loneliness of life.” p.81

Good stuff! If you have any confusion about where you are in life, and what your next season may be… this is a definite read.

Deep Beauty

The Cathedral was beautiful last night. A beauty that sang, spoke and confirmed things deep within me that are coming to the surface.

Courage and Strength

No picture this time. I’m so visual, it’s hard for me to post without a picture… next time. My mind is racing. I’m going back to the cathedral. The peace and solitude of beautiful music is calling.

For the past three days I have been at a conference that is impossible to explain, at Mars Hill Graduate School (completely unrelated to Mars Hill Church, by the way) All I can say is that I am refreshed beyond anything I ever thought would happen in these specific days.

I honestly didn’t even know much about the conference and I was just told that we had the opportunity to go. My life has been a bit of hell for the past few weeks, which sucks, yes… but I am thankful for it at the same time because I see beauty in the midst of it, for all involved actually, me included. But this to say that I was emotionally exhausted going into the conference and was done, basically. I had no expectations for the few days, and I was blown away at what found me there.

I think I know what I want to be when I grow up. Bringer of Light has found Courage and Strength to walk in what God has created me to be: which is entering me into a clarity that I have been searching for… for far too long.  As painful as it may be… I am profoundly looking forward to what’s around the corner: which amazingly enough has been right in front of me all along without me being able to recognize it.

In a way I don’t fully understand, I am deeply grateful for my current struggle. Sometimes what appears messy is really beautiful at the core. I am acutely aware that I would not have been able to see the clarity in the past few days, had it not been for the power of the struggle to empty and exhaust me, ready to focus and be filled.